Day 135 (A Hundred & Thirty-Five) of 365 days
I’ve always wanted to watch a lot of movies, so I decided to ask for an interesting one from a friend. As I sat there waiting for my movie to download, I started feeling guilty for not spending my time doing something more productive. I could always be more productive. I could be reading or browsing for new ideas. I could be working on my writing. I could be going over lecture notes. I still haven’t gotten any books for class yet. But I should be doing something productive, I thought.
Being in our early 20s, I find we always put pressure on ourselves to succeed right away, and in the process forget there’s still a lot of time for our ideas and ambitions to fall into place. As a writer, I’m always looking towards authors I respect as measuring sticks for my success. I take note of what they’ve accomplished at a specific age, and then bully myself into thinking I should have something equally as excellent to show for myself by that time or even earlier. We all have influences we compare our body of work with, and aspire to be like one day if we work hard enough.
Reading a book for fun and having some new ideas about issues irrelevant to your work won’t ruin you. Binge-watching a new TV series instead of doing extra research won’t impede your progress. A lazy mid-afternoon nap won’t put you behind the curve. We need to remember to take it easy. There’s enough time to do great things without holding yourself to unreasonable standards. It’s easy advice to forget because there’s so much we want to accomplish while we’re in our peak years, but you can’t criticize or taunt yourself into working too hard or too much. That’s not effective for long, or very healthy. You can’t decide to move at a pace unfamiliar or uncomfortable to meet your mind’s idea of accomplishment. There’s no ticking clock on your potential, which means there’s no reason to hurry into something you’re not ready for or capable of yet. If you simply continue doing what you love to do, with passion, and at your own pace, you’ll be just fine.
Can you relate? Maybe you want to start a new project, or lose weight, or change job, or end an unfulfilling relationship — but you just haven’t found the inspiration for the project, or lost those 10 pounds, or found the new job, or broken up with your significant other quite yet. I’m here to tell you you are right where you are supposed to be. It’s true. You are going at the pace that is normal for you and you will get there.
Now here’s the key: as you go at your own pace, let’s make sure that you are moving forward. Maybe you are walking slowly, or taking the scenic route, or jogging, or maybe you are even sprinting down the path towards your goal. The pace will change as you go up and down the hills of life. The simple way to keep yourself on track is to check in with yourself once a week and ask, “Am I moving closer to my goal or farther away from it?” When you ask yourself this question, please be sure to take care of yourself — this is not a time to beat yourself up for not already being at your goal. It’s just a time to check in and makes sure that you are still on the pathway heading towards your goal. And if you feel like you are on the sidelines, then maybe that’s right where you need to be for now. When you are ready, though, put on your shoes, get up and take that first step.
When you find joy in all the things you do, you have a joyous and fulfilled life. Sometimes, it is not easy to achieve it. With anxiety and stress taking over our lives, stealing our sanity, it’s easy to lose ourselves. Yet, we have to focus on what matters the most. Ourselves! To learn how to live, we need to realize that life is not a race against anyone else but ourselves. This realization is the first step to achieving our life goals. First, remember we are in control of our lives, nobody else, but for us alone. Then, the attitude we take towards any situation will determine the outcome.
We live in different stages, and our pace is dependant on which phase of life we are in. Recognizing our desires and potential makes it easier to focus on our race, aka life. The race is not against our peers; instead, it is a race against ourselves. At the same time, when we focus our energy, we will stop worrying about the place we’re going to finish in the race because our long-run objective is to finish.
So, it doesn’t matter what stage we are on. By stage, I mean finding our passion or working on it, or we are already living our passion. The “pro-runner” of today was yesterday’s beginner. We may encounter many problems along the way, but our determination and attitude keep us headed to the finish line.
