Day 158 (A Hundred & Fifty-Eight) of 365 days
Who are you when no one’s looking? Maybe because as a child I was scared if I messed up, my mum would be right there watching, and so there was this push to always make the ‘Nice List’ every time. Or maybe I didn’t want to disappoint my late grandmother who was looking down on me from the sky. Or maybe it was the simple fact that those words spoke so much truth to me, even as I was young.
We’re all different people when we’re alone, aren’t we? We dance around in our underwear, mumble under our breath, sing in the shower. Sure, maybe we have the same habits, same quirks. Or maybe we’re just as weird in the comfort of our home as when we’re with our significant others (honestly, isn’t that the dream?!). Maybe we work hard to be transparent, to show the most real parts of ourselves whether we’re in our bedroom doodling, or live on a social media feed.
When no one’s looking, do we still make the right decision? Do we still live unselfishly, or love with our whole hearts? When no one’s looking, do we put our needs first, or do we ignore everything that doesn’t pertain to us? When no one’s looking, do we return the money in the wallet to the stranger that dropped it on the bus? Do we leave a positive anonymous comment? Do we speak with kindness about a friend?
The moments that define who we truly are, are created when no one is watching. When our heart pushes us to do something simply because it calls to be done. Those moments when the only reward is choosing to do something for no other reason than to prove to yourself that you could do it — to prove that you can be extraordinary.
When no one is looking I’m often practicing for when they are, but also trying to enjoy being alone, which I do enjoy. As a writer I’m hoping for an audience who wants to read what I’m thinking about when no one else is looking; as a teacher and coach I want to be observed when no other teacher or administrative person is observing, because that’s when I’m most natural and hopefully most effective and true; as a parent, I want to be present at all times, and kind and smart with my kids, even if they aren’t paying any attention (sometimes I can leave the room and they don’t notice!); and as a wife, I want to be the same loving friend at all times, whether we’re catching a quick conversation while the kids are distracted, or whether we’re hiding from the kids to be alone together, or, on that rare occasion when we get to go out.
When no one’s watching, when we’re not asked to be accountable to anyone for anything we’re doing — that’s when our character speaks the loudest. When no one’s looking are we still shining, still loving, still being the best version of ourselves? Or are we falling into bad habits, making poor choices, quitting — all because there’s no one here to say that we can’t?
