Day 230 (Two-Hundred & Thirty) of 365 days
We live in a world that is becoming increasingly busy. Things are moving at a fast pace and we are forced to move right along with it. More is required of an average person than ever before. The benefit of our advancing society is that we can reap abundantly than our predecessors could’ve ever imagined. The downside is that we are often overwhelmed by the number of responsibilities and requirements.
Sometimes the feeling of being overwhelmed doesn’t come from the actual tasks and responsibilities we have but from the mental clutter that occupies our minds. For example, if you are at work and you start to mentally run through all of the things that need to get done once you leave the office; you need to get on the phone to reschedule a dentist appointment, pick up your kids from daycare, pay the electric bill, and then take your car to the auto shop, then you’ve already added to the pressure of those events by running them over and over in your head. Another example would be a person who is nervous about giving a 15-minute presentation. The hours and hours spent anticipating and worrying for days beforehand adds to the stress level, which may inevitably cause the feeling of being overwhelmed. So, how are we supposed to handle these overpowering situations?
Feeling like we are overwhelmed and being overwhelmed are the same thing. Some people have multiple projects that they cannot handle. Others may have one task to do that seems so large it appears overpowering. Either way, the person maintains a feeling that renders them feeble and thus unable to perform at their best. Before we can regain control of our lives, we have to learn to handle that overwhelming feeling.
If you have moments of feeling overwhelmed by your workload, here are some suggestions to try. Not all of these will be right for everyone, so pick what you think will help you. But always, always start with taking slow breaths (it’s better to focus on slow rather than deep breathing). Slow breathing helps you stop panicking and take a more long-term focus as it activates the brain’s prepare-and-plan mindset. If you focus on breathing out like you’re blowing up a balloon slowly, your breath in with naturally regulate itself.
We often self-generated rules we expect ourselves to follow. For example, “I need to reply to Sandra more quickly than she generally replies to me.” Or, “I need to reply to any email within the day.” Consider that when people take a while to respond, it sends the signal that they’re busy and prioritizing, and may lead to other people respecting their time to a greater extent. On a similar theme, you might also be self-generating faulty thoughts about what it takes to be successful in your field. Perfectionistic assumptions like, “To succeed I need to work harder than everyone else” becomes especially problematic when you’re rising through the ranks in a competitive industry and you’re in a group of other overachievers. Here’s the tricky part about identifying your problem thoughts: our assumptions and self-generated rules are often implicit. When you’re feeling miserable or blocked, that’s a great time to hunt down any hidden assumptions that are contributing to that. Look out for assumptions that cause unnecessary stress, especially if these also contribute to procrastination and paralysis.
When you take an evening or weekend day off and the sky doesn’t fall in, you learn experientially that you can be less anxious about your workload. If you want to feel more relaxed about work, act more relaxed about it. You can operationalize this however you want. Ask yourself “If I were more relaxed about my workload, how would I act?” and identify 3-5 specific ways.
If you are feeling overwhelmed, take a step back. Think about all the hard work you did to get you to this moment: all the applications, tests, papers, and books you read (or pretended to read but used SparkNotes instead) that got you here. Don’t let all of that hard work go to waste, because one day you will look back on yourself and be glad you kept going.
