GRATEFUL FOR FAITH

Day 364 of 365 days

It’s easy for me to feel gratitude when I run my hands through a grandchild’s hair or smell the damp earth after a spring rain or gaze out of a frosted window at the new-fallen snow. But what about the life of a newborn baby snuffed out before she took her first step? What about my mom’s ears that can’t hear my words? And what about a loved one shaking a fist and saying, “I don’t love you”?

Almighty God, thank You that I don’t have to earn my way to heaven. Thank You for the gift of faith. I know that I have been made right with You. I believe in being real as much as possible. It's exhausting not to be. So, I am prone to serious anxiety, and it doesn't quite yell faith. If I'm not grieving and regretting the past, I'm all wrapped around the axle about my current issues, or future tripping on the what if's. This is not a life of faith. I put God in a box, not deliberately, but I do. Some mornings I read my Quran and pray to hear His voice and see His greatness, and then surrender myself to Him for the day. If the day goes badly it isn't long before I'm stressing and anxious.

With God’s help, I am working on this by learning and practising gratitude. You can’t be cynical, fretful, or see God as limited and finite if you are full of gratitude. A heart of gratitude sees that with God, all things are possible, that He has done amazing things in your life, that He loves you and will never forsake you. It’s been a fruitful endeavour. My circumstances may not change, but my heart expands with growing faith. It is life-changing.

I am still in the learning phase and always will be on this side of heaven. As long as I’m in this tent I will never have perfect faith, but it can grow and it will help me to see God, myself, others, and circumstances more and more through His lens. I find it quite easier to give thanks than to wallow and ruminate.